Genesis 33-34

Genesis 33:4

Forgiveness tends to fall into two categories. One is forgiveness that is independent of remorse. The other is forgiveness that is dependent on remorse.

In today's reading we get an example of forgiveness that was independent of remorse which is often the forgiveness that is most closely related to the forgiveness offered to us from God.

Across chapters 32 and 33 we get the story of Jacob being reunited with his brother Esau. But before we talk about the significance of Esau's forgiveness, let's remind ourselves what has happened up to this point.

If you recall, Jacob and Esau are twins, but Esau was born just a few minutes earlier than Jacob so Esau was considered the firstborn of his father, Isaac. But Jacob was determined to actually get the blessing of the firstborn that had belonged to Esau. In order to do so, he and his mother came up with a plan to trick Esau out of his birthright, which he was able to do successfully.

To have the birthright and the right to the inheritance and the right to all of what comes with being the firstborn son was a huge deal at that time. So for Jacob to have deceived his brother to acquire that is as if your sibling, if you would have one, or even maybe your best friend, would just rob you out of your life's inheritance.

If you had a wealthy parent and you knew you had a trust fund or inheritance waiting on you, but it was taken from you and swindled due to deception, I think it would be really hard to let that go.

Well, when we get to chapters 32 and 33, a lot of time has passed. Jacob and Esau have actually gone their separate ways at this point. Just from this week's reading we know Jacob has worked 14 years for Leah and Rachel to be his wives, he's had 11 sons and he's built great wealth working for his father in law.

A lot of things have happened to this point but one thing we can almost certainly say has not happened is that Jacob has not apologized. I mean, look at the way Jacob responds when he hears Esau is coming to see him.


Jacob then comes up with a plan to send multiple gifts, things for Esau to receive, hoping to bribe him and to soften his anger towards him. But this is where the most surprising thing happens. What we come to find out in chapter 33 is that Esau has already forgiven Jacob.


There are three things I think are so significant about forgiveness that I think this story teaches. And this applies to both God's forgiveness towards us, and our forgiveness towards others.

The first thing that we notice is that we cannot buy our forgiveness. We cannot purchase it. We cannot earn it. Forgiveness is something that is granted or gifted.

Jacob tried buy the forgiveness of Esau with all these different servants and animals and things that we find in this passage yet Esau had already granted the gift of forgiveness.


And can I say this is very much in our relationship with God. God has already paid the price of our forgiveness, whether we have chosen to be remorseful or not. And if we can be honest, Jacob's motivation wasn't remorse. He didn't go seek Esau to request forgiveness.

The only reason he felt the pressure to do this is because he was afraid because Esau was coming to him. And so this wasn't even an instance of remorse. This was an instance of fear. And the reality is we have nothing to fear. God has already forgiven us of all of our deeds.

But the second thing that we find in this story is that forgiveness repairs relationship.

When Esau does meet Jacob, Jacob is surprised to find that Esau has already forgiven him.

He embraces him. He says, I don't need these things that you've offered me. I see my brother. I see his family. I am happy for you and proud of all that you have acquired.

All I want is relationship.

Forgiveness opens the door to reconciliation. It brings family and friends back together. And it brings us back into relationship with God

This is why God has forgiven us. He has forgiven us to restore a relationship with him. It was the entire reason and purpose for the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. It was to restore a Father with his children. And so we ought to accept that gift and the relationship that comes with it.

Last thing as this is already longer than usual. I think this story points out an unfortunate truth that forgiveness doesn't equal restoration.

If you notice after all of this, after Esau offers this forgiveness to Jacob, he is still stuck in his deceptive ways. He sends Esau off telling him that he will follow him and meet him there with the intent to never do it.


He actually goes a whole different direction. He doesn't even accept the forgiveness that Esau offers him. He does not accept the invitation to be restored and to be back in his family but instead chooses to continue in his ways.

And this is why I say this is an example of forgiveness without remorse. Jacob never intended to actually be one with Esau again. He never intended to be restored. All that he did was simply an act of fear to avoid having he or his family harmed. And so even after all of that, he goes and he goes his separate way.

Which brings to us two points of reflection.

Number one, are we still willing to forgive even when the person that we are forgiving does not change? This is what Esau chose to do. And it's also what God chose to do as he has forgiven so many who choose not to accept it.

Which is the second reflection. Let us not be the person who chooses not to accept the forgiveness that God has extended us. Walk in your forgiveness. Be restored to God. He has already freed you of all that you have left and left behind. All that you've done, you are free and you are forgiven.

Be forgiven. And then extend that forgiveness to someone else.

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